November 08 Simplicity Circle Newsletter

I am no longer offering the noon Simplicity Circles (held at the Herb Closet). I will only be continuing the evening Simplicity Circle meetings, held at 7pm.

With this in mind, our next Simplicity Circle meets Wednesday, November 5, 7pm-8pm, Panera Bread, 11649 Midlothian Turnpike, Richmond, VA 23113, 804-897-7222

PLEASE TAKE NOTE: This month we are meeting on Wednesday due to the tuesday election. We will go back to the regular 1st Tuesday of the month in December.

Simple Life

I need your feedback, Who is interested in the Simplicity Circles?
I am deciding whether or not to continue them, so your feedback is VERY welcome. Thank you in advance!

I am so grateful for meeting everyone and experiencing the gatherings at The Herb Closet. I have learned so much from these meetings and hope to stay in touch with you. Great Gratitude to all who shared in these Simplicity Circles.

QUESTION …

How do you handle a situation where one partner is neat and organized and the other is chaotic, messy or has alot of “stuff”?

I heard this scenario more than once at the Richmond Alternative Health Expo, and at other events. I see it when I work with clients as well. I would love to get Your ideas and success stories on this!

Hear are a few of my ideas on handling the conflict of partners’ lifestyles:

Simple LifePick Your Battles… Identify one or two areas of what is really important to you, such as picking up the dirty clothes, or having a simple kitchen to work out of. Communicate this to your partner and come up with a plan together to work this out, easily and with specific goals in mind. A suggested conversation might be focused on what you are having a problem with and not what your partner is doing wrong. For example, “I feel so frustrated when I see so many clothes on the floor, especially when I just picked up in here yesterday. I so appreciate when you help me get the trash out. How can we work this one area out so I don’ to keep experiencing this uncomfortable feeling.”

Goals need to be simple and specific as well, like “Every morning I will pick up my dirty clothes, or wipe the counter off before I leave for work.” Ask yourselves what you are responsible for and if this is reasonable. Ask yourselves if you are in balance with your lifestyle and your daily responsibilities, could you both compromise more?

Also, be realistic, once you have discussed your priority issue, let go of the rest of your issues with your partner’s mess as best you can. Consider their messy habit is not the worst that can happen, it is a lifestyle, just as much as being neat and organized is a lifestyle, and be grateful for the many positives your partner brings you. Let them know often what they are doing right, even the smallest task is worthy of your recognition sometimes.

As for the organized partner….continue to emotionally detach as best you can from the mess that bothers you. Also, you may have to declare one room in the home that is yours and no clutter is allowed. Let this room be your safe haven and neutral zone to retreat to when you feel your emotions getting off balance due to being around all “the stuff.” Or you both can designate a room for your partner’s own, to do what they will, mess and all, but not in the rest of the house.

I have heard on occasion, a partner declaring “If nothing gets done I am going to hire a Professional Organizer!” (by a particular date given). Ha! Action is often taken swiftly, either they clean up or the Professional Organizer is called in… and sometimes that is all it takes. This service is valuable in more ways than one :)

Simple LifeYou can’t change other people, but you can be willing to look at your partner’s lifestyle another way, ask yourself often, “How can I see this another way?” Given time, you may be able to see many different points of view of this situation. .

I remember my Granny’s house, she had alot of clutter, but look again… she had some treasures in that house. There was usually a story with every item, and if you couldn’t find something in a store, go to Granny’s house, she would have it and be happy to share with you her treasures. She was not going to change her ways, so I had to change my point of view about the situation. Just be willing to look at another’s lifestyle differently, give it time and see if something miraculous happens.

As we get into the holidays, our conflicts can be more heightened. Consider what Nancy Twigg suggests in her book, Celebrate Simply, in the section on Hospitality versus Entertaining….

“When you entertain, you bring honor and glory to yourself. Showing hospitality brings honor and glory to God. Stated another way, entertaining makes you look good but extending hospitality makes your guests feel good.” Your close friends and family love you and your partner, not your home, make the best of a situation if you want to have guests over. Many a time my Granny “swept off” her kitchen table so we had room to eat! I remember her more than the clutter.**

I have compassion for both sides of this issue and there is no quick fix. With some effort on both your parts, your world can change just by being willing to see what is this opportunity is trying to show you.

Accepting what is, on a very deep level inside you and doing the best you can with what you have, often releases the energetic charge of this issue between you and your partner. I have seen, once a partner takes responsibility for their own actions, the other partner joins in to meet their own responsibilities.

May your journey be light and easy.

So what have you done successfully to resolve this issue in your own home? I would love to hear from you and post it next month.

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I am excited to learn about a program, Save Our Food, www.SaveOurFood.org at the Farm Bureau that supports local markets and eating local food! What a wonderful way to live simply than to buy and eat local food. The benefits for ourselves and our environment are numerous. What a neat way to explore your area as well. I plan to visit some of these markets as a form of my recreation, aah, simple pleasures. From the Home page, go to Get Involved, click on Fast Food Locator to find the local markets.

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Listen to a really Great local radio station that I had the pleasure of being interviewed on this week by Rebecca Faris, on Indymedia Live ( 12:30pm on Tuesdays) at WRIR, 97.3 FM, www.wrir.org. Click on Listen: Primary Stream to get their current program. Just another way to get simple…listen to the simple entertainment from our local radio, just simply great!

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My talk on “Simplify For the Holidays…and Enjoy Yourself” is now available for any organization that wants to present it, or women’s groups to have a holiday home party.

Gift Certificates are available for your loved ones who have everything!

*Please remember that I have a NEW EMAIL; please make the changes NOW! =)

Christine@SimpleLivingNow.com

Great Gratitude, and Stay in the flow….

Christine Lynn
Simple Living LLC
804-869-4909
Christine@SimpleLivingNow.com
www.SimpleLivingNow.com
“Gently Showing Others Another Way”

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